I decided last night that I really needed to start This One Sweater That’s Going to be SO Amazing (heretofore known as “TOSTGSA”). This is an idea that’s been percolating for over a year. I finally got around to swatching it in time for the Twist Collective call for Winter 2013/14 submissions. It got rejected last night (it takes a lot of strength for me to tell you that. I hate telling people about rejections, it embarrasses me) and so I decided that I need to get this sweater out into the world as soon as possible because I am going to SHOW THEM (I know you know what I mean).
1.26pm – Arrive at studio (it’s summer, ok? In my defense, I made a lovely breakfast).
1.33pm – Locate all relevant swatches and re-measure against pre-recorded gauge. I’m not confident that gauges stay the same over time. It’s a murky world.
1.34pm – They’re the same.
1.35pm – Open blank excel document.
1.35 – 2.01pm – Stare at blank excel document. I don’t know what it is about those damn things.
2.02pm – Decide to make sizes in 4″ increments. I’ve already come to terms with the fact that the phrase “standard measurements” is an oxymoron and no matter what measurements I use, each size of the pattern, as written, will fit exactly one person. After those 10 people, the rest of the world is just going to have to make modifications and make do. Let’s all just accept it and move on.
2.10pm – There’s a wasp on the windowsill right next to my computer. Freak out. Consider calling one of my roommates’ wasp-killers boyfriends since I don’t currently have a wasp-killer boyfriend.
2.12pm – Steel myself.
2.15pm – Wrap Barbara Walker Stitch Dictionary Vol. 2 (it’s the thickest) in a plastic bag and slam the wasp multiple times. Thanks Barbara!!
2.16pm – Use spoon to scoop up dead wasp pieces and flush down toilet.
2.17pm – Use plastic bag-book protector to stuff in potential gap next to air conditioner (I’m so resourceful!).
2.19pm – Can’t concentrate on sizing sweater because I keep feeling phantom bugs crawling on me. Does this happen to anyone else? Right after I have an encounter with a bug I keep thinking every movement I see, every itch, every stray piece of hair in my peripheral vision is another bug coming to do me in.